New cooking show

[Cynotor]

Ladies, Gentleman and Trox:

I am but a humble Trox with a cooking show that normally broadcasts on the NLFtv (Nanomage Liberation Front Television).

After a few quite pleasing successes on our channel I was told that I should take it planet wide...

*static*

Fellow Rubi-Kans what our Troxian host is trying to say is that we of Cooking with Iron! & The Nanomage Liberation Front are pround to announce that we will be broadcasting our wonderful cooking show planet wide.

This show is to be educational and fun, loved by all young and old.

Each week we will be inviting a special guest to join us on our cooking.

We hope that you enjoy the show and if you have any recipes you would like to see on the show please send a PM here to the show and we will get back to you as soon as we can. Infact if we like your recipe we might ask you to join us on the show to present it.

Now back to our hoplessly stuttering host..

*static*

So umm ya with all that I said I guess wha t I am trying to say is I.. we.. i umm

*static*

He is trying to say we will now be showing you some previous shows..

*static*

Till all are free!!

Copyright @29478, Cooking with Iron! / The Nanomage Liberation Front

[Cynotor]

(Aired Wed Sep 29, 29478 on NLFtv)

Greetings Noble Lords, Ladies and Brother Trox.. TILL ALL ARE FREE!!

Welcome to the first installment of Cooking with Iron.

I am your host Ironox coming to you live from the Bore' Subway where I still am camping for the boots..

Well I should start by saying this was inspired by a couple of books I was reading during the long time the Striker Foreman took to get back from the reclaim... Guess he didn't register close to here.

The books are:

Towers and You! 101 ways to make towers into household or useful items by Antroxian

and

1001 Ways to Cook Omni-Tek Employees or anyone else who you want to cook up by Martha Trox

On todays show we will be talking shop and pulling from Brother Ant's book showing the different ways you can make those pesky towers into helpful grills for that after reeming party. Then we will be showing you the viewer how to make...

.. Grilled Leg of Omni!!

Yes folks We have a great show for you today that's for sure but first a word from our sponsors..

*static*

Hail all! Till All Are Free!

Ever have that not so fresh feeling after wiping a set of mining towers out?

Try Mr. Booms Scruby Dub Dub Cleanser.

Since 29476 Mr. Booms Cleansers have been used on many Omni-Tek employees, (Though it was in the testing stage an most of them died from shock of seeing there skin being boiled away.), we know that you will feel fresh and clean after using our product.

Don't believe us? Here is a satisfied customer:

Trolicks - I always had this not so fresh feeling after tower killings but then I tried Mr. Booms Cleanser and I was like a new Nanomage.. Strange though since I was an Atrox when I got i..

*Trolicks being cut off by the announcer*

There you go folks try Mr. Booms Scruby Dub Dub Cleanser today!

*static*

And we are back!

Ok here we go into the main part of the show. I hope everyone has a datapad ready or at least have gone out and gotten this great book..

Getting Started

* There are many types of towers on the market, from simple turrets and conductors to large Control Towers. Choose the tower that best suits your needs.

* One factor to consider when destroying a tower is whether the grill you are making is going to be covered or not. Some recipes such as Roast Omni or slow cooking barbecues, require a cover.

* The recipes covered in this show are designed for outdoor tower grills. However, most of the recipes can be adapted for use on an indoor fire. (Like torching Omni-Mining buildings)

* When using a Tower Grill, wait intil white ash has formed over the tower remains ( usually 5 - 10 minutes after the tower falls)

How Hot is Hot!

* Cooking times very widely when grilling. Wind, temperature, the size of the Omni and whether the tower grill is covered or not all affect cooking time.

* We give you approximate cooling times and tests for doneness, if appropriate. Most tower grill cooks will tell you that experience is the best teacher.

* Testing the temperature of the tower grill, use a hand test to determine approximate tempetures. Hold a live Omnis hand, palm side down, 4 inches from the hot metal or flame. Count the seconds you can keep it's hand there before it starts screaming: ( Or if you don't have a live Omni around use your hand , but becareful we don't want you hurt):

2 seconds - hot fire 375 or more
3 seconds - medium-hot fire 350 to 375
4 seconds - medium fire 300 to 350
5 seconds - low fire 200 to 300

*beeping noise*

Really?? wow folks look at the time.. this took longer then I thought. Well tomorrow we will go into safety savvy and quick clean ups..

uhh?? what?? oh the recipe.. Well we will have to wait intil another show for that, but trust me folks it is SO worth the wait.

This is Ironox saying goodnight and may all towers fall before you!

TILL ALL ARE FREE!!

Copyright @29478, Cooking with Iron / The Nanomage Liberation Front

[Cynotor]

( Aired Thu Sep 30, 29478 on NLFtv )

Greetings Noble Lords, Ladies and Brother Trox.. TILL ALL

ARE FREE!!

Welcome to Cooking with Iron.

I am your host Ironox coming to you live from the Bore' Subway where I still am camping for the boots..

Today we will continue with.. you know.. no we won't, I want to get into the cooking part..

Did I hear someone arguing with me?!*glares off screen*

*mumbles* Ya thought not..

Ok here we go with the Leg of Omni that I was talking yesterday *smacks lips*

I have to tell you friends nothing, but nothing beats a barbecued butterflied Leg of Omni. When important company - meaning clients or family - come to visit, I know you can count on this to wow 'em.

*words float up the screen as I talk*

You will need the following:

1 boneless leg of omni, trimmed and dearmored ( about 4 to 5 pounds bone-in, 3 pounds boned)

1 jar (12 ounces) chutney

1 medium-sized red apple, unpeeled, cored and cubed

2 tablespoons honey

2 tablespoons cider vinegar

2 cloves garlic, cut into quarters

1/2 teaspoon black pepper, or to taste

~all these items now available at the Cooking with Iron Store~

As I get everything ready here is a word from our sponsor..

*Static*

Hail all! Till All Are Free!!

Like what you have seen on todays show?

You can cook just like Ironox with the opening of the new Cooking with Iron Store! We carry it all:

* Fruits and vegetables from around the galaxy delivered fresh daily.

* Spices, spices and more spices.. You want to flavor it.. We got it

* Beverages- Do we have it? of course we do! We carry over 500 different beverages from all over known space

So come on down to the Cooking with Iron store located in the wonderful town of Borealis.

Mention this ad and get 10% off you first purchace

*static*

Aaand we're back

Ok on to the cooking part, first we will lay the leg of Omni out and pound the thickest areas with a Sacrosanct
Aban Mallet or a Baseball Bat until the meat is 2 to 3 inches thick. This will promote even cooking of the Omni.

*Pounds on the meat with Kyr'Ozch Sledgehammer*

ahh that looks about right.. Next you place chutney, apple, honey, vinegar, garlic and pepper in a bowl and process until the mixture is well combined, but still chunky. Now for this I like to have a friendly and most helpful Nanotech around for there use of the Microblade Whirlwind. If you don't have one around you can use a Tango Dirk.

*watches as a Nanotech off screen casts the spell. Then takes out a small sample*

Perfect thank you noble mage. We are going to remove about 1/2 cup of the mixture; reserve to serve as a condiment with the meat. Process remaining mixture until it is a fairly uniform puree.

*Motions for the Nanotech to finish*

Ok so now we coat the Omni with about half the pureed chutney mixture. Let that marinate 1 hour at room temperature, or longer in a refrigerator (Perferably overnight if you can).

*covers leg up and sets aside. From just to the left pulls out another wrapped leg*

This here was a leg I got from a battle yesterday that has been marinating overnight. We remove the leg from the marinade and discard the left over marinade. Place leg on a high heat tower grill. Cook 4 to 5 minutes per side to sear.

*pictures swings to a subway tower grill*

*sizzling and popping noises can be heard*

yumm I wish y'all could smell how good this is..

*more sizzling as the meat is flipped over*

Ok now that we have seard the leg we will move it from the hottest part of the burning tower. Cooking it for 15 to 20 minutes, basting liberally with remaning pureed chutney mixture and turning every 5 minutes. Check the internal temperature after 10 minutes. Leg is medium rare when the internal temp reaches 140 and medium at 150.

*screen flickers*

Well it has it's about 16 minutes later and the leg is nicly cooked up and we are going to let the leg rest for about 5 minutes before slicing. Cut thin slices against the grain, serve with the reserved 1/2 cup of chunky sauce.

*you see a nice spread of a warm leg of Omni, the steam rises up off the slices as your mouth begins to water*

Well that's it friends, tune in next time when I cook up...

.. Clan-Style Leetribs

See you then!

TILL ALL ARE FREE!!

Copyright @29478, Cooking with Iron / The Nanomage Liberation Front

[ As a side note the recipe in RL calls for Leg of Lamb.. you can talk to your local butcher on alts. that you can use instead of Lamb]

[Cynotor]

*static*

We at Cooking with Iron have been notifed that some people would think our Leg of Omni as canalablism, but we see it as recycling..

*picture changes to tower battles*

Many many Omni-Tek employees die every day since none can stand before the might of Tne Nanomage Liberation Front!

TILL ALL ARE FREE!!

*clear throat*

Sorry got carried away..

Anyways there are so many left over bodies that we thought it would be nice to use an Omni for good.

But Ironox and all of us at Cooking with Iron do understand your concern so we will be issuing an update on other legs of <target> you can use in the previous show..

Look for it soon!

~Cooking with Iron Staff

Copyright @29478, Cooking with Iron / The Nanomage Liberation Front

[Dabblez]

How about hosting your show on Channel42 sometime?

[Cynotor]

( Aired Fri Nov 05, 29478 on NLFtv )

Greetings Noble Lords, Ladies and Brother Trox.. TILL ALL

ARE FREE!!

Welcome to Cooking with Iron.

I am your host Ironox coming to you live from outside Rome Blue where I am camping for shoulder pad parts..

Sorry that the show has not been around but it has been crazy with towers and all. Today we will continue with the show which should have been Clan-Style Leetribs but it is going to be Pumpkin Head Pie in honour of Halloween.

As a special treat we have a special guest with us, our very own Marsis!

Hail Marsis! TILL ALL ARE FREE!!

*looking a bit nervous* Hail Ironox, till all are free!

For all of you that are un aware Marsis gave me the idea for this recipe just days before Uncle Pumpkin Head was to show that orange globe of a head. So I thought it would be nice to include her in this program.

*looks over at Marsis* Ok maybe we should get on with the cooking..

*Cut to Ironox and Marsis walking into a camp kitchen*

I have to say Noble friends and viewers that a fresh Pumpkin Head Pie really hits the spot on a cold night of hunting bots for pad parts.. Mmm Mmm Good!

*words float up the screen as I talk*

You will need the following:

1 9 inch deep-dish or up to 11 inch but shallower regular pie crust

1 1/2 cups Pumpkin Head puree

1/2 cup maple syrup

1 cup heavy cream

1/2 cup milk

4 eggs

2 tablespoons flour

1/4 teaspoon nutmeg

1/4 teaspoon ground ginger

1 teaspoon cinnamon

~all these items now available at the Cooking with Iron Store~

As Marsis and I get everything ready here is a word from our sponsor..

*Static*

Hail Rubi-Ka! Till All Are Free!!

Like what you have seen on todays show?

You can cook just like Ironox with the Cooking with Iron Store! We carry it all:

* Fruits and vegetables from around the galaxy delivered fresh daily.

* Spices, spices and more spices.. You want to flavor it.. We got it

* Beverages- Do we have it? of course we do! We carry over 500 different beverages from all over known space

So come on down to the Cooking with Iron store located in the wonderful town of Borealis.

Mention this ad and get 10% off you first purchace

*static*

We're back, Marsis needed to go blow sh.. err work so I will finish off the cooking.

First we need to prepare the pie crust. I recommend freshly baked regular pie crust, in a pie dish, at 400 degrees.

Then heat the pumpkin head puree in a heavy pan; stir frequently.

Add milk and cream to the pumpkin head puree, continue heating gently and stir until smooth. Keep it hot but don't let it boil.

In a heatproof bowl, beat eggs (and sugar or maple sugar) until smooth.

Beat in dry spices

Beat in flour, then maple syrup.

When the pie crust is baked, beat the egg mixture while pouring the hot pumpkin mixture into it in a thin stream. The resulting mixture will be hot but not so hot as to cook the eggs.

Carefully pour hot pumpkin filling into hot pie crust; return to center of oven and bake at 400°.

~I sugest you fill the pie partway out of the oven, then top it off with a cup or ladle with the pie positioned in the oven, as the slightest sticking of the oven rack is liable to cause filling to slosh all over.~

The pie is done when the outside edge of the filling is firm and slightly puffed, but the center is still jiggly. Remove to a rack and let cool gently, so the custard can first finish cooking, and then set.

*screen flickers*

Ahh here we go..

*pulls cooked pie out of oven*

along with the Pumpkin Head Pie I recommend whipped cream with appropriate flavoring:

In a chilled bowl, with chilled beaters, gently beat one cup of heavy cream to not-quite-soft-peak stage.

Add either:

2 to 3 teaspoons confectioners sugar and 1 to 2 tablespoons of appropriate booze, such as dark rum (to offset the maple pumpkin pie) or for the serious ones you can uses Hit-the-Floor Jack.

2 tablespoons maple syrup

Carefully beat to desired stiffness.

*flash to a completed pie*

And there you go Noble's a fresh Pumpkin Head Pie!

Next week we will have the Clan-Style Leetribs. See you then!

TILL ALL ARE FREE!!

Copyright @29478, Cooking with Iron / The Nanomage Liberation Front

[Cynotor]

We the staff here at Cooking with Iron would like to send out our deepest sympathy to the friends and family of Aazamon.

The loss of a great leader and a greater friend has hit us hard so in the matter of good taste and out of respect for Aazamon we will not have a show this week.

We would also like for you to join us in a moment of silence..

















Till All Are Free!!

Copyright @29478, Cooking with Iron / The Nanomage Liberation Front

[Cynotor]

Originally Posted by Savoy How about hosting your show on Channel42 sometime?

We can do that.

[should I contact you in game or you can PM me and we can set something up]

~Cooking with Iron Staff

[Dabblez]

Channel 42 is a free for all (roleplayers) service, you don't need to ask anyone permission to host a show on it.

If you want to, you can book the time with "/tell Channel42 !report "<your message here>" but let's face it there is no competition for air time at the moment.

Posting on the Buzz the time and day of the show might help remind people to tune in on the day.

[rheena]

Yes please put this on Channel 42 .Its great!

[kudayne]

Yes it would be awsome. but could you do somthing for the recycling of clam...oops I mean clan? I am sure there are some people who have extra clan parts laying around too. :P

[Cynotor]

Originally Posted by kudayne Yes it would be awsome. but could you do somthing for the recycling of clam...oops I mean clan? I am sure there are some people who have extra clan parts laying around too. :P

You never know what Ironox has up his sleeve for the next show.

Stay tuned in..

~Cooking with Iron! staff

[Trgeorge]

I must most strongly protect to cooking Omnis. I know they are in most cases tender and leaving them to rot seem such a waste, but....

Have you ever seen what are they eating? With a heavy interstellar transport (especially now with invasion), have you ever wondered what happened to all spaceship waste? Yes sir, modern foodprocesing technology can work wonders, but those Omnis are still full of intergalactic waste.

But those corpses can still be handy. Just leave them where they drop, they make wonderfull fertelizer. Of course with most contaminated cases you get by-products like walking, talking pumpkins, but just wait couple of years (or beat those pumpkins senseless).

They can also be produced into many helpfull household items. For instance just use some lenght of rope an two or three sticks and you got yourself greaat scarecrow. Ever wondered how many feet square your pool measures? Then better bring sack with you to next tower war. There's pleanty of uses.

For last I would yet again warn agains using Omnis for cooking (and consuming). It's a nice show and would be shame to be forced to take it offline becouse of cases of food poisoning.

[Cynotor]

*static*

We here at Cooking with Iron! welcome any viewers comments and would like to speak of this one sent to us by Trgeorge:

Originally Posted by Trgeorge For last I would yet again warn agains using Omnis for cooking (and consuming). It's a nice show and would be shame to be forced to take it offline because of cases of food poisoning.

Well Trgeorge you are right that it would be a shame for something to happen but in the case that you mention we would like to point out that we use the Finest cuts of Omni in the recipe in question.

But again you do bring up a good point. For this viewers we would suggest using higher ranking Omni-tek employees. you normally can find these as heads of Omni-Tek departments..

Please also note that we provide safe cooking temperatures for all of the recipes these are for you our viewers protection. Also please keep your cooking area clean and wash your hands often during cooking.

Again we welcome any questions, comments or requests left here and they will be answered in a timely fashion.

from all of us here at Cooking with Iron! we wish you safe journeys and good eat'ins

~Cooking with Iron! Staff

[Cynotor]

( Aired November 20th 29478 on NLFtv )

Greetings Noble Lords, Ladies and Brother Trox..

TILL ALL ARE FREE!!

Welcome to Cooking with Iron.

I am your host Ironox coming to you live from the Temple of the Three Winds where I am still camping for Guardian Tank Armor..

Well things didn't go as well as I hope today as the Guardian of Time is really being camped this week..

*camera swings to show long line of people lining the walls of the Guardian chamber*

Or someone leaked out that we were filming here..

*large Atroxian figure stands behind Ironox holding up a sign reading "We LOVE Cooking with Iron!"*

*Another reads " R.U.R. KitchenAid Bot! It slices, it dices.. but then the Guardian spwans and squishs the sign and the Solitus holding it*

Well that will leave a stain..

*fades to Ironox walking into a temple camp kitchen*

Since it will be a bit before my turn comes around we will not be able to do the Clan Style Leet-Ribs this week. So in it's place I am going off into the left field..

I got a number of requests from the people of Rubi-Ka stating that there are in fact people who don't like to eat meat products. Well at first I admit I was really in shock, as I would never really go meatless.

But then this is a show for the public and just for you non meat eaters I have a special treat for you!

I dug and I searched and found two recipes for you from old earth times.. Might even be from Sweden and Finland. First up is Punajuuripihvit followed up by Rotmos!

First off will be the Punajuuripihvit which is loosly translated as Finnish Beet Steaks..

*words float up the screen as I talk*

You will need the following:

1 pound can of sliced beets

1 egg ( or egg substitute ), lightly beaten

1/2 cup fine dry bread crumbs

2 tablespoons margarine or butter ( again or substitute )

1 tablespoon lemon juice

1 tablespoon chopped parsley

~all these items now available at the Cooking with Iron Store~


Now while I get this ready a word from my store..

*Static*

Hail Rubi-Ka! Till All Are Free!!

Like what you have seen on todays show?

You can cook just like Ironox with the Cooking with Iron Store! We carry it all:

* Fruits and vegetables from around the galaxy delivered fresh daily.

* Spices, spices and more spices.. You want to flavor it.. We got it

* Beverages- Do we have it? of course we do! We carry over 500 different beverages from all over known space

So come on down to the Cooking with Iron store located in the wonderful town of Borealis.

Mention this ad and get 10% off you first purchace


*static*

Ok lets start this off.. since *sigh* we don't have the Guardian to make a stove from we will just vent our FUSTRATIONS OUT ON HIS MINNIONS!! ... errr ... umm I mean put them to a good use.. /whispers sorry Glittch..

*picture swings to fly bits of metal as Ironox dismembers the minions and puts them together as a nice looking stove*

Ok so we have our stove and fire going.. now in the past we have done open grilling where today we are going to use a pot and pan.

*picture zooms on Ironox infront of a camp table. A sign is held up behind him "R.U.R. DLK-2000! Not just for Alien sp.." But a Guardian minion respawns and takes out the Opifex signholder.*

*sigh* when will they ever learn.. *flicks ear off shoulder pad*

So we start off by dipping the beets in the beaten egg. Then we sprinkle half of the bread crumbs on a clean working surface; place dipped beets on crumbs and sprinkle with remaining crumbs.

*Ironox turns to stove*

Hey! Gets your hand away from my stove!

*Ironox slices Cultist for 538 points cold damage*

*Cultist falls to ground dead with a suprised look on its face*

I swear so hard to run a good show in this place..

Alright we have the beets ready now we melt the margarine in our skillet. You will want to saute' the beet slices, turning to brown on each side.

*sizzling and popping can be heard as Ironox cooks*

Ahh here we go.. Now that we have them nice and browned we take them out of the pan place them on a platter and sprinkle them with lemon juice and parsley.

And now the Rotmos which is also loosly translated Mashed Swedes

*words float up the screen as I talk*

1 pound yellow turnips, peeled and cut into 1/2" cubes

2 vegetable bouillon cubes

2 cups boiling water

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/8 teaspoon ground white pepper

1/8 teaspoon ground allspice

1 1/2 pounds potatoes, peeled and cut into 1/2" cubes


This one is very easy to do as we just place turnips into a 2 quart saucepan. Add bouillon cubes, water, salt, pepper and allspice then biol for 15 minutes. Then add the potatoes and cook another 15 minutes or intil everything is tender. Drain and mash!

*Picture swings to show a completed pot of Rotmos*

Sorry to have rushed but it is almost my time for a chance at the Guardian!

Next week we will try to have the Clan-Style Leetribs. See you then!

TILL ALL ARE FREE!!

*fades out while Ironox is beating down the Guardian*

*shout fading* What in the blazes do you mean no Arm...

Copyright @29478, Cooking with Iron / The Nanomage Liberation Front

[ It is hard to believe but I did make these one night as I had a vegetarian friend coming over. it was a huge hit and suprisingly good. So I would say give it a try, you might like it. ]

[Fixerben]

Check out the article on Cooking with Iron! by clicking here!

[Cynotor]

*static*

To the loyal fans of Cooking with Iron!,

We the staff wish to apologize for a lack of shows in the past month. Things have really gotten very busy for all of us here and the show has/had to be put on hold for a bit longer then we thought.

Have no fear though as the show will be back up and running in what we hope will be under a wekk from now.

Thank you and may all your cooking be good,

Cooking with Iron! Staff

[ Sorry everyone I finally got approved for a house that I was trying to get so I have been busy trying to move and then my DSL was also shut off... *frowns from the AO withdrawl* ..Anyways I am hoping that the connection will be made sometime this week or early next week and I can be back. ]

[Dabblez]

Looking forward to it.

Dabblez

[kudayne]

yes mnore coocking with iron we want those ribs we keep getting promised. an Poor RuR i hope they arnt a sponser man if they are they need to get a refund poor guy keep getting squashed like that.

[Cynotor]

[ hey I just wanted everyone to know that I have not forgotten you, things became really busy for me and they have not stopped.
With that said I wanted to let you know that I am trying really hard to work on the next shows and trying to make a spot for a Cooking with Iron! Store.
Please keep checking in and I will see you soon

~alto]